It’s always baffled me that we think it’s appropriate to remark about changes in someone’s weight when we see them... this video has been a long time coming.
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Do we think they have no mirrors in their house and they haven’t noticed?
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I’ve used a few examples here that are closest to my personal experiences, but it’s an issue that affects people young and old, skinny, fat and everything in between.
Everyone seems incapable of putting themselves in the other person’s shoes.
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It’s really fucking simple. Just shut the fuck up and keep your observations the fuck to yourself.
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Maybe it’s a dear friend and you’re concerned about what the changes in their physique indicate about their lifestyle and their happiness... well then find a way to ask them about that! There are plenty of ways to ask someone how they’re doing and if they’re taking care of themselves without highlighting how it shows to everyone who looks at them.
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I live behind the scenes these days, working with people who struggle with their physiques and as a confident for friends. I know how sensitive a subject it is, even if they don’t show it and nervously laugh off comments.
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I grew up thinking it was an Asian thing, but then I realised that in Asia people (particularly older relatives) are particularly blunt about it with “Wah, so fat now ah?” whereas in the West people like to make it a joke with a “Ooh heck, you’ve let yourself go a bit eh mate!”.
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Both parties can go fuck themselves, and I’d love it if as many of you as possible who ever get made even slightly self-conscious about such remarks would take it upon yourselves to tell them so 🖕🏽
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Spread the word. Maybe, if it happens enough, we can sway the culture.
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